Positive Celebrity review: What the show 13 Reasons Why taught us. And my personal story.
Positive Celebrity review: 9/10
“Sometimes we have thoughts that even we don’t understand. Thoughts that aren’t even true—that aren’t really how we feel—but they’re running through our heads anyway because they’re interesting to think about.”
― Jay Asher, Thirteen Reasons Why
I was quiet when my father’s abuse ensued for years. That is one reason I’ve been irritated with critics and their thoughts on 13 Reasons Why. It’s more than just a Netflix original, the show is meant to teach, pain, reality, hidden emotions, bullying, crime, love, and relationships, especially, how badly people like Bryce want to change but are so confused they have no idea how to change for the better.
13 Reasons Why shares emotions that maybe you have never felt. Or maybe your the jock reading this right now who recently pushed someone into a locker.
Most importantly, the show takes a stand on “me too,” showing that even men are a part of this group. In fact, many women out there either falsely accuse men of rape (because they can) and get away with fake police reports.
Just because you didn’t live it, does it mean it’s not happening?
Truthfully, it’s not easy to talk about abuse at school or at home. Further, if we look back far enough my dad has spit on me for “being a tomboy,” and not “classy” enough to show off to his Romanian friends.
Maybe you think having a mop shoved up your ass is “going too far,” for a series, but it’s not and let’s talk about why it’s not going “too far.”
Let’s start off by a quick introduction to the show, Hannah Baker was one of the main characters in the show 13 Reasons Why and she is the one who left those tapes that lead her friends, her abusers, and those who loved her to the truth.
With that in mind, we now know that she takes each of the viewers through a whirlwind of truths, explaining the reasons why she gave up on life, shared secrets that not even I could live with, it wouldn’t be easy, in fact, it is never easy to share those open wounds with family or friends.
What did the show 13 Reasons Why teach us?
The show is based on fictional high school characters, and the series shows it’s viewers many issues that are relatable. Everything…everything from fallouts with friends, love, bullying, isolation, most importantly, the fact that it could happen to anyone.
Many can relate to using a smile to mask the pain we feel because life can be cruel at times.
Of equal importance, actions always have consequences, even the smallest actions we take, we will eventually pay the piper, much like Justin, Bryce, Clay, and the rest of the crew.
In addition, the show 13 Reasons why teaches us that there are definitely two sides to every pancake, confusing us, who told the truth, who has all the pieces of the puzzle, lastly, who to trust and who to fear.
Beyond physical abuse, the show 13 Reasons Why taught us that words are powerful. Most importantly, you cannot take back communication, it’s the one thing that cannot be reversed.
The huge impact words can have on others, don’t believe everything you hear because sometimes, it’s far from the truth, trust actions, not words.
The show 13 Reasons Why takes us through each of our favorite characters, including the antagonist, giving us a feel for what happens inside the mind of someone who “rapes,” yet has no idea why they are so “fucked up,” as Bryce had mentioned in his recordings through different ways of expressing his emotions and truthful apology.
Throughout all of this, it taught us that communication is key and we should always listen to those willing to talk about the problems they face, as we all have a different trek in life.
Maybe you’re wondering how Hannah Baker committing suicide is a lesson for us to learn.
Let’s look at this way, Hannah’s first struggle, it was blunt, graphic even for some viewers. I don’t know about you but I have felt like Hannah Baker before, I was bullied in school for looking like a “little man,” and hanging out with the guys because they were my “bros,” and girls were overdramatic.
In fact, my home life was so dramatic, I didn’t need any of that other stuff in my life. The show related to me on many levels, including “me too,” I sure as hell would have stood up with the rest of those students had it been a real assembly taking place in my life.
Of equal importance, Hannah’s choice created such a ripple effect. Let’s throw down an example.
What if I had successfully killed myself in 2012 after I put my dad away in jail for taking a can opener to my head and punching my mom?
She likely would have ended her life as well, and the rest of the family would have suffered but because I was strong because the universe put something inside of me to never give up again, we are okay, we are happy, we are healing, which means one thing for anyone who can relate to home abuse.
It hurts, it’s temporary and you will take it as long as you decide but the moment you make the choice to put “the monster,” haunting you away, you will find peace, further proving that our trials are temporary and suicide irreversible forever, you can’t take it back and people you never even knew loved you, well, they’ll suffer.
It’s safe to assume many of you reading this have either been able to relate to abuse or know someone who has been abused at home or at school, or hell, even work because it doesn’t just “go away,” after you graduate.
This baggage, those fears, they all follow you through life. Most importantly, life is full of bullies who never grew up and there’s always one person you can think of at work or college that seems to have no love in their heart.
There is always one, no matter what job you take or what state you move to in order to “reset,” life.
That’s just another important fact of life that the show 13 Reasons Why taught us. Life is hard, life is blunt, life goes by fast so why waste it hurting others?
Hannah Baker’s struggle was a lesson, a cry for help that eventually leads to her death, which created that ripple from friends she didn’t personally know to teachers and parents.
The whole community mourned over her death.
Honestly, bluntly, the show 13 Reasons Why taught us endless things about life. Including the fact that every person (including you) have their own trials, barriers that slow us down or sadness deep down in our hearts, over something that happened years ago.
Backstories exist in every single living person on this planet. Painful ones because there is not one person immune to pain, not even “celebrities.”
“You don’t know what goes on in anyone’s life but your own. And when you mess with one part of a person’s life, you’re not messing with just that part. Unfortunately, you can’t be that precise and selective. When you mess with one part of a person’s life, you’re messing with their entire life. Everything. . . affects everything.”
― Jay Asher
For instance, Beliebers, you all know about Justin Bieber and his post about his past, present, and hopes for the future. But you likely thought “oh he’s rich, he must be so happy.” Well, so was Bryce and he came from a broken family. Now that’s a stretch because J-dawg has never raped anyone or bullied anyone to the point of taking their life.
We have all hurt someone, you are not excluded even if you’re reading this right now and thinking “not me,” false.
Beyond watching the show 13 Reasons Why, shouldn’t it be common sense to be kind, to spread love and to put a stop to any bullying we may see at school, work or even the most unexpected places like standing in line with someone who is racist and treating employees like shit due to their race or age.
Critics are wrong to take the negative side and say “there is nothing good about the show.” In fact, they likely are in a lot of denial about life. They likely either never felt those emotions or maybe they were the ones doing the bullying, you just never know.
As a person who runs a positive niche, I am not afraid to say I used to bully someone, the reason being my dad bullied me, such a cause and effect, don’t you agree?
Fortunately, when I turned about 22, I apologized to anyone I thought I may have hurt and their response was beyond comforting, creating a friendship that should have existed than not just because I said sorry, the bullying never should have happened but when you get called a man at school and then go home and think the worst possible things about yourself confirmed from your own father’s mouth, it hurts.
Also, the show 13 Reasons Why gave us the perfect example of “different situations cause people to handle them in different ways.”
For example, you obviously know at this point I am part of the “me too,” movement and I didn’t give up but Hannah Baker did and so have so many other people in our real-world lives, whether it be rape, drugs or pure depression.
We all handle those treks so differently, our pain tolerances are different from the rest of the world.
However, regardless of the situation, we must always remember to be a friend because you truly never know what someone might be going through in their life. Further, not one friend of mine during middle school or high school knew about my home life but now I ask myself “what if they did at that time, not now but at that time.”
Research has shown that most people who bully are often dealing with their own battles at home, in their personal life. Justin is a prime example of abusive home life and it’s cause and effect on his external world.
He vented his anger on others at school, don’t be so quick to label someone unless you attempt to talk to them, seriously, just befriend them, give them a real reason to trust you and show that you care by being kind, you could not only save their life but trickle left behind had they not had a friend like you to come and help them out in more ways than you can possibly imagine.
With that in mind, it’s also important to remember that even though they are being abused it does not legitimize their toxic behavior, instead it will help you better understand, putting you in a place to help.
Lastly, do not be a bystander. Unfortunately, I’ve seen more fights uploaded in our new spawning generation than someone who has the guts to stop a fight they are witnessing.
Bluntly put, put your fucking phone down and do something about it, you can watch UFC if you really wanna see a fight go down.
People are wrong to say that the show had no lesson or no room for further seasons. Film and TV is about creating beauty, it’s about putting ourselves in front of that camera, vulnerable as ever and sharing with the world a story they may relate with and carry with them for life.
In my case, filming heals. It’s all about getting those emotions on the little or big screen.
To expand, the show 13 Reasons Why taught us to be a better version of ourselves than we were yesterday.
That my friends is called a successful show and we feel it deserves a 4th season, which is seemingly set up perfectly on the last episode of the show 13 Reasons Why, season 3.
Suicide should never be an option for a situation that is temporary.
If you are struggling, or know someone is struggling, remember you can always call and talk to someone who can help, further, you can approach someone and just be a friend. You never know whose lives you might save by being a friend.
The show attempts to stress these lessons and we’re not sure that many are looking at the creative side of the show rather than “that was too bloody.”
Maybe, just maybe it needed to be that way to wake someone up, such as a bully, possibly…
Maybe it was “too much,” for you but for someone else, it might wake them up and help them realize “holy sh*t I’m acting horrible and it’s time to change.”
Ditch The Label shared reasons why suicide is not an option.
- Because no matter how lonely you feel. You are not alone. We are here and you matter.
- Because you have a bright future which may not seem so clear, but trust us – it’s there even if you can’t see it right now.
- Because there are people who care about you deeply – don’t end your story early.
- Because you could save somebody else’s life with what you are going through now, somebody who in years to come, feels everything you are feeling now and only the words ‘me too’ could ever reach them. Be there to say those words.
- Because help is available and millions of people all over the world have felt how your feeling and still recovered.
- Because no matter how it comes across in the show, it is not glamorous or mysterious, it’s devastating to those around you
- Because you are enough and deserve to be here.
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline is there to help and you can contact them by phone (Call 1-800-273-8255) or even chat.
There are so many options to seek help, if you feel that low and not comfortable talking on the phone, remember, there is also texting available.
Be strong, be kind, pick someone up off the floor and stand as an example to those around you, they will notice your love and it will spread.
If by chance you haven’t had the chance to binge-watch the show 13 Reasons Why then consider it. Maybe it isn’t your favorite genre but it’s a show that can teach you something powerful.
In fact, each of us will take something from the show, and it will likely be different for each person who takes the time to watch, listen and learn.
Have you ever been a victim? Feel free to share your story in the comments below.
Have you helped someone before?
Then, it’s your time to sound off because you never know who reads the comments, that alone can change a person’s life.
13 Reasons Why | Justin Prentice Reads Your Letter | Netflix
The story I kept a secret.
Here I stand, listening to these letters, they hurt my heart because I too can relate. In the year of 2010, I was skating with a “Mormon,” guy.
He would sit outside with me and eventually made me feel as though I could trust him. One night at about 9 P.M., he showed up to my friend’s house where I was living at the time (my dad’s abuse was too much, so by the grace of this friend and their family I moved in) he asked me to come sit with him.
I was happy, said sure and told my friend’s parents I was going to walk my mom’s fur baby.
We walked the neighborhood but he said to me “over here is a shortcut through to the park.”
We got there and he forced himself on me, the words clear as day, “you’re going to be number 99,” followed by him sticking his fingers in where they were not welcome saying “you’re so tight.”
I felt like if I fought, I would end up dead, so I didn’t, I let it happen. And when he was done got home, took a shower, and laid in my bed crying. I never did report the mother fucker.
But the above is a picture of him was a picture of him (see still fearful) and hopefully, someone, somewhere in Utah will see this so I can go forward years later.
Walking back he knew I was upset and stated: “if you tell anyone your best friend will be next.”
I loved her, so there were only a handful of people who ended up knowing.
Lastly, at the end of the day, I would have never guessed this person I trusted would turn around and violate me.
As a virgin, I was absolutely destroyed inside and out.
You are not alone, thank you to the cast and crew of 13 Reasons Why for helping me heal, for showing the world what happens, for being genuine and turning this passion project into utter healing for many of us who watch the show.
To end, Christopher, you know what you did, I don’t know where you are, or what you’re doing, or even your last name. But I hope that one day all the people you hurt before me, heal.