LPT: How can I help? The best question for hard times.
How can I help?
Truthfully, “how can I help?“ is one of the best questions you can ask someone who might be going through some rough patches.
Thankfully, the show New Amsterdam slammed that into the heads of its viewers, sparking attention to detail.
For example, it feels horrible when you end up sick, people just get used to it and it feels as though they care less and less as time progresses.
Then comes the stigma regarding Chronic illnesses which can’t be seen on the outside but very much so on the inside.
“That person is so lazy, they can’t do anything, they don’t even try.”
“Others imply that they know what it is like to be depressed because they have gone through a divorce, lost a job, or broken up with someone.
But these experiences carry with them feelings. Depression, instead, is flat, hollow, and unendurable.
It is also tiresome. People cannot abide being around you when you are depressed.
They might think that they ought to, and they might even try, but you know and they know that you are tedious beyond belief.
You are irritable and paranoid and humorless and lifeless and critical and demanding and no reassurance is ever enough.
You’re frightened, and you’re frightening, and you’re “not at all like yourself but will be soon,” but you know you won’t.”
Isn’t it too bad we don’t have x-ray vision?
Unfortunately, while people are living their best life, going to school, concerts, traveling the world, securing careers and having a family…
Others are at home counting spoons to get through the day.
Luckily, maybe you had a day off and got to take a shower and watch some Hulu or Netflix… And we just wrapped up forcing ourselves to take a shower.
What about the Chronically ill?
Sadly, people do have a hard time getting out of bed in the morning and taking a shower…
Depression and other ailments can make your normal activities of daily living feel unachievable.
Under those circumstances, it’s incredibly important to ask how you can help rather than assume.
Common Misconceptions of Chronic illnesses
- Just because of the way a person looks on the outside, it does not mean they aren’t feeling physically ill.
- They seem to be enjoying themselves, they must not be as sick as they explain.
- Why invite them, they won’t come anyway, they are sick (if only they knew planning is possible).
- You should get a real job if you can do any tasks at home.
- Working from home or being home all day long is a dream (from first-hand experience it’s not always fun and who likes to be home all the time sick)?
- You just don’t want to come out anymore, you’re a flake.
Rather than assume, realize it’s not a legit reflection about how chronically ill a person feels.
Judge less, learn more about the situation.
With this in mind, hundreds of inspirational quotes come to mind… but are we actually practicing them?
Regarding this, bad things happen to us all, not just those facing chronic issues.
Shouldn’t we be more helpful when life hits us a few times?
And in the importance of having someone by our side to say “it’s okay, how can I help?”
Well, that changes everything because you’re not giving advice that someone has already heard, or trying to sell them a “cure-all.”
In fact, it shows that you care, it shows that you’ve likely gone on Google to learn more about x subject in order to help a friend or loved one.
Simply, listening, and asking how you can help someone in need saves lives…
You can be surrounded by people and still feel completely invisible and alone.
The invisible diseases are haunting.
Life may not be easy but it’s worth it, especially when you have the right family and friends.
How can you help?
As for you, you also have two choices, speak up, talk, and keep on fighting to the good fight.
Anyhow, the ones that walk away were never true and you deserve better in your life.
For this reason, it’s important to judge less, love endlessly, and be supportive, you can save a life.
Due to the fact, it’s relatable as a person with Crohn’s disease, Reddit offered relief.
Above all, if not for those stranger friends, who knows how life would have turned out?
Thank you, Reddit for having the best communities in the world, and for saving lives.
Shout out to those in and out of my life who do this for others, you’re all simply amazing.